Strap in folks, your in for a long blog post all about treating yourself right! This will cover a few things, from the way your negative/anxious thoughts affect you to the whole #bodypositive hype (in search of a better word) All in all this post is about making sure you treat yourself right so that you can overcome whatever hurdles are in your way!
There’s been so many terms like ‘body positivity’ coming forward these past few years that it’s hard to avoid the topic on social media. But really, why would you want to?
We all know that bullies exist outside of the world of highschool. From weight issues to a persons appearance there’s always someone willing to pick others apart for whatever reason they can find.
In the past few years a phrase, now also a hashtag has made its way into the media. Body Positivity. While socially it raises debates on matters like supporting obesity, the basic message behind it (at least what I take from it) is that “you should be comfortable in your own skin” To me that doesn’t mean stay as you are, if you wish to lose weight then lose it. If you want bigger boobs then get those bigger boobs, if possible. But accept that what your body looks like, has looked like and will look like is beautiful! You own the image of yourself that you want to project, sure if you don’t have flat abs and instead have a ‘muffin top’ (rolls eyes) the first time you wear a crop top will feel incredibly uncomfortable! If you have scars or stretchmarks or loose skin to hide then your not going to want to wear anything that bares it all to the world, I get it.
But who says those things are ugly?
Who says you have to dress for your shape? Who says you have to worry about coverups to hide stretchmarks or scars? Wear what you want to wear regardless. I don’t know about you but I’d rather be rocking a bikini on the beach than sweating through a costume and a coverup! But that’s just me, and while I still have a way to go my body doesn’t stop me from being comfortable.
No one should to put you down for looking like you!
Stand up for your skin. Easier said than done, what with everyone online having the comfort of a screen to hide behind right? Easier said than done when you think that the people you pass on the street see your flaws and believe them ‘ugly’ sounds like something you’d say in reply to me?
I know how hard it is, but you can work your way to feeling confident enough to say ‘fuck it I like this and I will continue reguardless’
It begins with not demeaning youself.
When you have anxiety, your thoughts tend to become rather negative. Everything is viewed in black or white, and even then the white is sometimes tinted grey.
You become so judgemental and harsh on yourself, Everything you do is up for criticism, as if you can’t do or say anything right. Constantly thinking doubtful thoughts about your appearance, your talents, what you’re doing in life, your future, will undoubtedly lead you down the road to unhappiness.
But how can you be okay when you are surrounded by a constant orchestra of thoughts telling you how wrong you are?
If a friend had made a mistake, what would you say to them? In the truth if they have been the one to make a mistake, or if they’ve said something hurtfull I will tell them “Yeah, you’ve screwed up” Honesty goes further than deluding them after all, however the important part lays in the next word. “But”
Yeah you’ve screwed up, but you can fix this! I’ll help you.
Mistakes can be fixed, lessons can be learnt. Would you tell your friend that they were a failure? That they should give up? That they are the worst person to ever walk the earth?
No, of course not.
You’d help them to feel better right? If a friend hated their appearance you’d help them feel more body confident, be supportive and constructive. If a friend was doubting their ability to do a job you would offer up helpful suggestions so they could home their skills or learn new ones.
So talk to yourself like you would a friend. The next time you feel like beating yourself up about something that didn’t quite go to plan imagine what you would say to someone you loved, what advice you’d give them, all the positive things you would say.
Being body positive isn’t necessarily about your tummy or thighs, it’s all round confidence in how you look and feel! If you treat yourself with kindness, and be as accepting to yourself as you would a friend then confidence will follow
For now, that is all! I hope it made sense, sometimes a ramble on long posts. Either way, leave a comment at the bottom and start and dialogue. Until my meet post, see you online! Charlotte x